Judah's MRI (body scan)

Just a quick update tonight before I will hopefully lay my head on the pillow and not wake up until morning...and I don't mean like 1 or 2 or 3 in the morning, not 4 or 5 either. 6:00 would be okay, but I'd prefer a little later than that, too.

(You're gonna be getting the slap happy tired Briana here, by the way.)

Overall, we experienced so much of God's grace. There were several times today that I looked at my son and thanked God for giving him to me. What a gift our Judah is to us. He teaches us so much about God and brings us so much joy seeing God's amazing grace on him.

The fasting thing all day was not easy, but it really could have gone so much worse. The kids and I walked down to our dear friends, the Grigers, for a "J" breakfast: Jello jigglers and juice! Not the breakfast of champions, but what ya gotta do when you've got to otherwise starve a 3 year old all day.

We made it through most of the morning with only a few pleas for lunch. Eventually, Lawrence took just Judah out to run some errands and to a playground so as to take his mind off his hunger and allow me time to get things together for the rest of the day.

We arrived at Hopkins on time at 2:30, our procedure scheduled for 3:00. Lawrence's sister works at the hospital, in fact on the very floor where Judah's procedure was going to take place. When she stopped by to pay a visit, Judah said to her, "I'm going to be brave a little and I'm going to cry a little". Improvement from just last Friday when he was resolved to only cry! That's remarkable growth in a short amount of time, if you ask me.

And, that's precisely what he did. He was supremely brave! He did not cry even when I took him back the hallway and into the procedure room. He just held tightly to me, and tried not to look anyone in the eye. He let me reassure him, though, and I sensed so much of God's grace in that moment, being able to impart courage to my little boy at the very same time God was imparting courage to my own heart.

He began to cry only when I had to place him on the table and put the mask on his face. He struggled quite a bit, longer than any other procedure/surgery I remember in the past. But, eventually, it knocked him out. And, at that point I know what I will hear next, "Mom, why don't you give him a kiss and we'll take it from here." So, that's what I did, on cue, just like I've done so many times before and walked out of the room, entrusting my son to the care of doctors, nurses and ultimately to God.

I had my "little cry" then, and Lawrence and I took Bella to grab something to eat and wait. Two hours later, my little man was being wheeled to recovery, everything having gone smoothly. He woke up quickly in recovery but was very cranky. I always feel badly for the others in the recovery room having to deal with the cranky kid, especially when it's mine. Of course, that's to be expected and somewhat out of his control, but I feel badly nevertheless.

Our seasoned nurse and mom of a 3 year old herself knew to pop in a movie as quickly as possible. Madagascar, provided some relief but what really motivated him to stop crying and start drinking his water was when I mentioned we'd go home as soon as he proved to his nurse that he was ready to go home. By now, he knows what that means.

Consequently, we were released rather quickly and with enough stickers in hand for Judah's entire Sunday school class, we headed to the car a little after 7 p.m. We were doing fine until we strapped Judah into his carseat and he threw up all over. Actually, I was grateful. I knew he had a lot of air trapped in his stomach, and figured throwing up would help get some of the anesthesia out, too. We called just to make sure and were told that indeed throwing up is a rather normal response to anesthesia, that as long as he didn't throw up continuously thru the night, he should be fine. Dehydration is the concern.

We arrived home, and just after I had placed Judah on the couch, he threw up again. It's now 10:15, and he's cleaned up and in bed. We're hoping he won't throw up anymore. Please pray to that end. Also, he was intubated for the procedure and as is typical, is experiencing some hoarseness in his throat. Intubation can be a tricky thing with asthmatics, but it seems Judah fared well enough today. The anesthesiologists were pleased with his response. Nevertheless, we are also praying that his airway will remain clear and 'un'-infected.

As always, thanks for praying and caring for us.

Yesterday, we took Judah to Hopkins for two different doctor's appointments. The first was a pre-op. evaluation for an MRI he'll have done this coming Monday. The doctor heard a heart murmur for which she tried to schedule a last minute ECG but couldn't. Admittedly, I was glad to not have to drag him to another appointment, but later became a bit anxious about it. It's something we'll follow up on at another time, and God willing won't fret about it until then.

The second appointment was a laser treatment for his face. Applying the numbing cream went rather well, but as to be expected, he screamed once we walked into the laser room and didn't stop until we left. Our doctor commented that he did really well to which I said, "I hate to see what 'bad' looks like".

Judah's face is looking pretty rough right now. He blistered in a few spots and has bruises all over as well. Unlike treatments in the past, his face also swelled up a bit. So, we're giving him Motrin and applying vaseline, hoping it heals up quickly.

Please pray for Judah and for us as this Monday, we have to return to Hopkins for an MRI. He'll have anesthesia for it and won't be able to eat all day. His scan time is scheduled from 3-5 p.m.
The MRI is being done from his neck down. His legs will be measured at this time as well to evaluate him for a related syndrome called Klippel Trenaunay Syndrome which effects one's limbs. More on the MRI later, if need be.

All in all, we are feeling our need for God's grace this weekend and into the early part of next week. Of course, we're always in need. We just feel our need more acutely at times. We'd appreciate your prayers for us. Thanks!

I'm Going to Cry

Judah's appointment went okay..it's over. That's always the best part...when it's over. Unfortunately, he doesn't know the worst is right around the corner.
Today was just a CAT Scan. Next Friday is a laser Tx, and the Monday following a full body MRI (a 2 hr. scan that he'll be under for). Poor buddy. I knew he wasn't gearing himself up to be brave when we were getting ready to leave and he said to the Abuelos (that would be his grandparents for all the non-Spanish speaking people reading), "I'm going to the doctor and I'm going to cry." :)

He kept saying it to me on our drive down to Hopkins in between oohing and ahhing over all the construction equipment on I-95. I was grateful for the distraction for him.
I let him walk with me for the first time instead of taking a stroller into the hospital. So, we did the escalator for the first time, too...he screamed for the first one. I talked him through it and by the time we reached the top, he said, "That wasn't easy, mommy" (meaning, that wasn't hard). He was quickly asking to do it again.

He was great in the waiting room and walking down the hallway with the doctor. We got into the room and when I looked at him, he just had the poutiest little face that said, "I'm about to cry. If anyone makes a move in my direction, I'm going to let 'er rip." And, he did....and didn't stop until I picked him up off the table at which time he immediately stopped and said, "We're all done, mommy" in the most pleasant tone of voice ever. Ironically, he picked the sticker that said, "I was good. I sat very still". HA!! We'll let him live in his delusion. Don't we all want to live there after all? :)

He got a sprinkle donut afterwards from the cafeteria, and we were able to have lunch with Judah's Tia Yvette (that would be his aunt). Overall, I was very grateful and aware of God's grace. He's an amazing little guy. There are few other things that consistently show me the face of Christ and the power of God's grace like all the medical stuff we go through together. I would never ask for it and I would give it all up for a "normal" situation in a minute, but I'm grateful that I know God and that we get to teach Judah about God through the lot that he's been given.

Oh..one other thing that is just too cute to not mention. We were in the bathroom at the hospital today and Judah held up his thumb and said, "Mommy, my thumb is purple."
Me: "Well, it's more red than purple."
Judah: "I have a birthmark on my thumb."
Me: "That's right, Judah. Who gave you that birthmark?"
Judah: "God"
Me: "That's right. Why did He give you a birthmark?"
Judah: "Because He loves me. "

My prayer is that it remains as simple as that for him...at least for a little while.

CAT Scan

It feels like it's been a while since we've had a doctor's appointment for Judah. But, in the next several weeks, we'll be making up for that! ;)

Friday, I am taking Judah to have a head CAT Scan done as a follow up from his brain surgery, May '06. Remember that? It feels like a lifetime ago. It's a routine follow up test to see if the shunt is working properly. NO anesthesia needed, for which I am very glad. It's typically a rather quick test, but convincing a three year old to lay still and cooperate may be a bit of a challenge.

We'd appreciate your prayers. Thanks.

Potty Training Update

I know the whole world really wants to know where the Almengor's stand with potty training. That's why I had to make time to write this post. It dawned on me after returning from a neighbor's house last night that really, the rest of the world doesn't need to know that my little boy has 'big boy pants' on and poopied in the toilet. But, somehow caring for three little kiddos all day long, everyday has sent me into a warped world where I forget that not everyone is as consumed with pee, poopie and puke all day long as I am.

Nevertheless, I am very happy to announce (because I know you're all on the edge of your seats wondering) that Tucker has been in big boy underpants for TWO days in a row now!! Not without accidents, but more in the toilet than on the floor. His batting average (for the few sports minded moms out there) is above 500! For the rest of you, that means that he's gone in the toilet more than 50% of the time versus the floor. And, so you don't think I'm condescending to you by explaining the batting average, I had to clarify that with my hubby. :)

I decided to hold off on training Judah as he decidedly told me he would not pee or poopie in the toilet, and the few times I got him on the potty he couldn't figure out how it worked. However, I think since I began witholding the M & M's from him after Tucker went potty, he has a bit more incentive to begin figuring it out.

Because I know you are so interested, I'll keep you posted on the developments of the latest and greatest in the Almengor household!

Re-defining success

Today was what I call a "humdinger" of a day! I am currently sitting at Panera typing on my hubby's work computer, trying to remind myself to eat my soup like a civilized human being as there are adults around me, watching me, probably wondering why I'm scarfing it down at the pace of a marathon runner (that's what I have to do at home if I'm going to get anything in me). Thanks to my wonderful husband for allowing me a few hours to get out of the house, re-group mentally and refresh emotionally and spiritually.

I did not jump into potty training full force today. Diapers are still being worn and may be for quite some time. Who knows? I liked Beth's comment about not having to worry about dating issues if we never decide to potty train! :) And, like Gretchen (Gigi) said, they'll figure it out eventually, right?!

Back to my humdinger day.
Given our computer is no longer in commission, I had to write my "to-do's" on paper today. Unlike days gone by, my list was only about 4 bullets long. I didn't think I was being all that ambitious. I had committed to making a meal for a friend who recently had a baby, and I had corn on the cob that needed cooked, de-cobbed and frozen (it was less than 2 dozen... not like 100 ears which people who are serious about freezing vegetables for the winter do).

The other things on my list I considered optional....like finishing, or even starting for that matter, about 7 loads of laundry, making something with the 6 peaches that are ripe and quickly going to rot on my counter, and taking the indoor trash to the outdoor trash can in the back yard. I didn't think that was aspiring to much. And, I thought I'd try to include the boys in on my cooking ventures as they typically are very enthusiastic about that. Yes, it would take longer to get it done, but it would be quality time spent with them and more importantly, it would keep them under my direct supervision and out of trouble while I worked. :)

Things didn't quite get off to a speedy beginning. By 11:30, I pretty much had nothing done. AT least it felt like nothing even though I had been literally spinning all morning trying to meet the needs of my children. By lunch, I was exasperated with my children and a bit fearful that I wouldn't finish the meal I had promised to my friend. At one point, I was trying to clean up the crumbs on the floor when my son jumped on my back. I yelled at him and felt immediate conviction that I had at that point grieved the Holy Spirit and sinned against my son. He was in need of discipline, but more importantly, I was in need of forgiveness and God's grace.

I took my son to discipline him but first asked for his forgiveness. Together, we prayed and asked for God's grace. This doesn't look quite as polished as it reads here when actually doing it with a three year old. But, it's not about appearances, is it? :)

God graciously reminded me of His truth, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." And, I sensed His Spirit say something to me that I've heard sooo many times from Him before, "I know what you need. Trust me." I got up from the floor (literally and figuratively) with fresh faith that He would enable me to do what I had committed myself to for that day.

Later in the afternoon, I had the blessing of talking with my dear and faithful friend, Laurie, who shared with me what a friend once shared with her about success. We must re-define our definition of success. It's not about what our house looks like at the end of the day or even what we look like at the end of the day (believe me, today it's not so pretty!). It's about having a greater appreciation for the gospel. It's about being more grateful for grace.

I'm definitely ending the day with a greater appreciation for the Gospel. Christ, the perfect Son of God, died so that I could have forgiveness for yelling at my son, so that I could together with my son talk to God, inviting His help for a situation that is absolutely impossible to manage without Him.

I'm ending the day more grateful for grace, the undeserved gift from God. In my 'brutishness', He still lavished kindness and blessing on my life by allowing my boys to take an uncommonly long nap, freeing me up to get the dinner together for my friend.

So, my house is a wreck. There are probably 4 loads of wrinkled laundry waiting to be folded on my bed at home. There is a sink so full of dishes that I can't see through my pass thru window and there are peaches rotting on my counter because I couldn't get to them today. But, I will go to bed knowing I had a successful day, at least in the eyes of my Savior. And, I will wake tomorrow and pray that you will awake, look at the day ahead and know it will be a success if we come to the end of it once again more grateful for grace.

Computers and Potties

They are sort of related in our world as of late.
You see, our computer went to the potty..it's toast...won't turn on...FINISHED!
My boys are three years old, and they have yet to learn what our three year old computer did rather successfully: to "go to the potty". Which brings me to this post.
1. I will not be online much until we figure out how to make that money tree in the backyard grow in order to buy a new laptop. :) Anyone have suggestions of a good laptop that might last us more than three years?

2. I MAY make an "official" attempt at potty training this week. It's probably not a good thing that I'm still undecided. I thought I was decided. We went out Saturday and had the boys pick out underwear and bought the treasured potty candy. But, then today (the day I'm supposed to start) I woke up and thought, "Do I really want to do this?" I've got an extra meal to make for someone today, caregroup tomorrow, a dinner out with my sister in law on Thursday. Is this really the week to begin training? Of course, next week will come and I'm sure there will be plenty of excuses then, too. To start or not to start, that is the question. The little men are not out of their beds yet, so I'll spend some time in God's Word and pray about it (hopefully before they wake up), and see if I can make a humble yet decided effort at the potty training thing today. I would appreciate anyone's prayers.

Perpetual State of Ugliness

Ever feel like you live in or as a perpetual state of ugliness? If it's not toys scattered all over your house, it's the lawn that hasn't been mowed for weeks. If it's not 3 year olds screaming, "no" right at your face, it's YOU screaming, "no" to your hubby. (Not all ugliness is outward afterall.) If it's not spit up running down your shirt, it's simply that your shirt doesn't match your pants, and you walked out of the house not even noticing. If somehow you managed to get your hair done before you walked out the door, you certainly didn't get makeup on as well. And, the rare occasion, if it happens at all, that you walk out the door feeling like you look like a million bucks, I'm sure a bird will poop in your hair or something.

So, today I get to go to TWO different doctor's appointments...for what you ask? WARTS. Isn't that lovely? I hate warts. Specifically, I hate warts on my body. I've had one on my foot since before the boys were born...yes, that would be years now! And, right before Bella was born, one showed up on my thumb. I've already had it frozen once; it didn't go away. Today, I get to subject myself to that minor form of torture again as well as get a shot in the bottom of my foot, yet one more attempt to rid myself of this disgusting thing!

I'm not really sure why I'm going through with these painful procedures to get rid of these ugly, pesky little things especially when/if these things ever go away, there will just be the next thing on my list of things to do in order to rid myself of this perpetual state of ugliness. :)

Spider Girl!

This is how my friend, Laurie, affectionately referred to my efforts to scale a wall. I'll have you know I made it all the way to the top AND rang the cow bell! I feel oh so accomplished! :)

Going to the Letters

This morning, I have the opportunity to ride on a friend's guest pass and work out at the "Y". So, I was telling the boys this morning about our day. Here's how the conversation went:

Me: "Boys, you're going to go with mommy to the YMCA and play with your friends while mommy works out with her friends."

Me: (to clarify for them, thinking to myself they probably don't know what the YMCA is since they've never been there) "We're going to the gym."

Judah: "Mommy, can I go to the letters with you?"

Is that too adorable or what?!

Need More Advice

Thanks for all the advice re: potty training.
I think the consensus is I wait a few more months.
I may give it a go with only one of the boys and see how that goes. But, if it doesn't go well, I feel better about waiting given all the input regarding boys and their "delayed" cooperation!

Moving on from potty training to painting....
Lawrence and I have LONG wanted to overhaul our master bedroom, like since we moved into the house in 2003! Anyone who has seen the bedroom will agree that it needs some serious attention. Lawrence and I are not agreeing (surprise!) about where to begin. I say get the bedding first and work the paint around it. He says pick out paint first and work the bedding around that. Any other opinions out there? Help!

Potty Training Advice?

Anyone want to offer some potty training advice to a clueless mom of 3 year old twin boys?
Laurie and Suzanne, I'm particularly interested in hearing from ya'll, of course! But, anyone is free to give their two cents. :)

Do I leave diapers on them? Pull ups worth it? Let 'em go naked? Sit in the bathroom all day? Only train one at a time given only one of them seems really interested in it anyway? The other is nearly refusing to go on the potty? What about naptime and bedtime? They still wet their diapers at nap and bedtimes. Stay home all day until they get it? What to do when we have to go out? And, anything else you might think I need to know about.

Thanks for your input!

Use For Garden Tomatoes

I haven't written in a bit but not for a lack of things to write about as much as a lack of time to do so. Lawrence just finished up two weeks on the road except for a much too short "visit" home this past weekend which we were all grateful for. He's home now, and life feels right again. In his absence, we kept quite busy. Made a trip to PA to spend a few days at grandma and grandpa's house. Thanks Mom and Dad. The boys had a blast swimming in the pool with you, going to Knoebels Grove (the most wonderful family park around!), and watching much more TV than they usually get to watch here at home. On Demand Kids' Channels are amazing!!

In addition to our trip to grandma's, Bella had her 6 month checkup which, apart from having to keep the boys from climbing the walls, went rather well. She appears to be growing just as she should and, though she cried like any normal baby would when receiving shots, did rather well.

Again, Judah proved to be the bravest little boy around at the eye doctor last week. In addition to cooperating well with the parts of the exam he knows well, he also allowed Dr. Abrams to check his pressures which is typically done with him under anesthesia as it involves eye drops and allowing the doctor to basically poke on his eyeball with something called a "tonopen". He was hesitant, but mustered up the courage to sit still for this. And, his pressures were the lowest they've ever been in his life, a definite sign that the surgical interventions he's had are working and were worth it. We are definitely giving thanks for this.

And, finally I come to the reason for this post's title: "Use for Garden Tomatoes".
My mom gave me some fresh tomatoes from her garden which I used in a great, easy recipe tonight out of my Real Simple magazine. The recipe is for something they call, "Pasta with marinated tomatoes and mozzarella". (I have to laugh at their recipe titles as they are basically just a list of all the ingredients) :)

Here it is with my improvisations:

1 1/2 pounds tomatoes, diced
1/2 small sweet onion, roughly chopped
2 T. olive oil
8 oz. fresh mozzarella, cubed
1 pound fettuccine (used spaghetti but it would probably be better with thicker noodles)
1/2 cup fresh basil, torn

In a large bowl, gently combine the tomatoes, onion, oil, mozzarella, 1 1/2 tsp. salt, and 3/4 tsp. pepper. Set aside and let marinate at room temperature for at least 10 minutes. Meanwhile, cook the pasta according to package directions. Add the drained pasta and basil to marinated tomatoes and toss to combine. Divide among individual bowls.

**I added some shredded chicken breast to it that was first boiled and then heated up with an oil/butter combination to add a bit more protein to the meal.

For me, it had all the components of a great summer dish: fast, easy, oven-free, healthy, use of fresh ingredients and tasty!! Really, it doesn't get any better than that!

Miracles DO Happen!

Beginning last night, I mentally prepared for today's adventure with the kiddos: a trip to Sears Photo Studio....ALONE! Yes, I went where no mom should go alone and survived! The miracle is that every child remained CLEAN (no clumsy falls into the dirt loading into the car, no juice spills down one's shirt, not even spit up from the baby until right after the photo shoot was over).

As if this isn't enough, NO child threw a temper tantrum, not even mild whining!! My boys obediently held on to the stroller to and from the car (twice because I forgot a coupon in the car and had to go out and get it); they played contentedly with their cars on the floor while I chose photos and sat quietly eating their animal crackers while the photographer shot a few individual poses of Bella. And, while the pictures aren't the most amazing in the world, I walked away with some "good enough" pictures of my babies who are all growing up so fast!

If you'd like to view them, let me know and I'll send you the link. Make sure I have your email address.

A Fun Tag

I have several things to write about, like the boys' recent 3rd birthday that we celebrated with great fun or the week ahead of me when I must 'hold down the fort' while my hubby travels for work. But, instead, I wanted to do this fun 'tag' found on my friend, Beth's blog.





A--Available/Single?--Always and Forever to the best hubby ever, Lawrence!


B--Best Friend? God has blessed me with many close friends


C--Cake or Pie? Cake, but only if it's super moist or anything from "Apple Annie's"


D--Drink of Choice? water or this summer, iced coffee


E--Essential Item You Use Everyday? glasses or contacts


F--Favorite Color? any bright color on my husband



G--Gummy Bears or Worms? worms, but not really a gummy fan



H--Hometown? Lehighton, PA



I--Indulgence? getting my hair done at Bubbles, Dunkin donuts coffee and choc. chip muffin, watching TV in the evening and anything chocolate



J--January or February? February, the month my Bella was born



K--Kids and their names? Judah, Tucker and Isabela



L--Life is incomplete without? God, His church, my family and friends



M--Marriage Date? March 16, 2002



N--Number of Siblings? 2 sisters and 4 brothers



O--Oranges or Apples? Mandarin Oranges



P--Phobias/Fears? massive, nearly unhealthy fear of bats and of my hubby dying on me



Q--Favorite Quote? don't really have one



R--Reason to Smile? I get to see my daughter smile and sons laugh nearly everyday.



S--Season? I'm definitely a fall girl...love hayrides, pickin' pumpkins, making apple everything, fall smelling candles, pulling out jeans again, the crisp air, etc.



T--Tag people? I don't usually like to



U--Unknown fact about me? Given my LOVE of chocolate, it might seem strange that I don't really prefer chocolate icecream.



V--Vegetable you don't like? beets



W--Worst Habit? eating something sweet in place of a meal



X--X-rays you've had? teeth and wrists



Y--Your favorite food? fruit, chocolate, anything my mom bakes



Z--Zodiac sign? Libra

Our Time Away

I figured I should get something new on the blog since we're well past the asthma episode.
Judah responded well to the nebulizer treatments and has since had no more asthma episodes. The boys are both back on their daily steroid through the nebulizer and probably will remain on it through the fall and winter now. I hate having them on a daily medication, but it is much better than having an asthma attack land us in the ER.

After MUCH deliberation and prayer, Lawrence decided that Bella and I would go with him to Florida earlier this week. It was not an easy decision for either of us, but God was gracious to reveal some lessons He was seeking to teach us through it all, mainly about Lawrence's leadership and my submission. More on that in another post someday (maybe).

Bella was an absolute joy to have along with us. She did amazingly well on the flights. Late night flights, though putting you at your destination late at night, are much preferable for traveling with babies as 1. they tend to sleep through the flight and 2. there are typically less people on those flights. Bella was my companion during the day while Lawrence was in class. We ate breakfast and lunch at Panera, about a 10 minute walk from the hotel. We had our first "cream tea" at a local place called The Chai House. (well, I had the tea and scone; Bella just watched me eat and got a 'taste' of it later when she nursed). :)

She and I took our first girls only shopping trip where I stumbled upon a great little boutique that had a coat I really wanted to buy. See it here. It also had a line of embroidered items that I fell in love with, one item being a onesie that had "Sweet Pea" embroidered on it selling for a measly $18.

In between many phone calls home to check in on my sick boys, I read parenting books, Christ Our Mediator, watched an entire episode of Hells Kitchen, got to see Martha make brownie cookies for icecream sandwiches which I may try to duplicate for the boys' upcoming 3rd birthday party, took a long, uninterrupted nap, played around with styling my new haircut and adored the rare opportunity to have one on one time with my baby girl.

Lawrence and I were able to catch up in the evenings for dinner. One night we walked all over the place trying to figure out where we'd eat only to end up back at the hotel for some undercooked chicken and french fries. Mine was the undercooked chicken and thankfully, I didn't get sick from it. But, we did get my meal for free! The 2nd night, we ate at an American Cafe where I had better luck with a Hawaiian salad that was one of the best salads I've ever eaten. It had glazed chicken, grilled shrimp, pineapple, toasted cococut, mandarin oranges, pecans, and mixed greens. It was so flavorful, I didn't even need to use the sesame dressing that came on the side. We topped our dinner off with one of our favorite summertime desserts: icecream!

Writing it all out, I see that God provided some great memories for me with my daughter and husband, time for rest and re-envisioning as a mom and protection for my boys while they stayed at home with our sitters (who were amazing to willingly and lovingly care for our little sickos while we were gone...thanks, Kristin and Melissa). Unfortunately, I had a hard time while away really separating myself from what was happening here at home with the boys. I find it seems to get harder and harder to leave my kids for any amount of time even if it's time I know I need and will be well appreciated after the fact. I guess this is common to motherhood. Nevertheless, I am back in my "nest", re-envisioned for the hard but wonderful task of mothering my three little gifts.

Thank you, Lord, for time away to hear from you without the distraction of a dishwasher needing unloaded and three diapers needing changed all at the same time. Thank you for wonderful resources like Shepherding a Child's Heart and Teach Them Diligently that help to guide Lawrence and me in parenting our children for your glory. Thank You for Your Word that reveals the depths of my heart and need for You as I try each day to be a godly wife and mom. Thank you for Judah, Tucker and Bella, truly good gifts from You!

Asthma Returns

Judah and Tucker both have a history with asthma. We've been in the ER on several occasions, but last fall and throughout the winter, it seemed we had gotten it under control. The boys were put on a daily steroid via nebulizer which seemed to help them significantly get through colds without struggling with asthma. They recently started with colds or allergies (can't tell which it is), and had been handling it fine even though I've had them off the steroid for a couple months now....until this afternoon.

Judah woke up with a fit of asthma and on went the nebulizer mask. In the past, it's been difficult to control once an asthma attack occurs. The preventative measures seem to work best for our guys which means having that daily steroid in their system. Well, they've been off of that and so I'm a little anxious as to whether or not we'll be able to get this attack under control.

In addition (and we are finding this to be so par for the course in our home), Lawrence and I are planning to fly to Florida with Bella on Sunday evening for a CPE class he has down there. Every summer Lawrence usually has to fly somewhere to take continuing education classes, and I try to go with him if at all possible as we only end up paying for my flight since his flight and hotel costs are covered by his firm.

Please pray that we can get Judah's asthma under control and that Tucker and Judah's colds will clear up with enough time for me to confidently join my husband next week.

A Tucker Funny

One day recently, Lawrence's parents, for whom Spanish is their first language, were hanging out at our house. I often ask Mrs. Almengor to speak Spanish to the boys when she is here because Heaven knows, they're going to learn much more from her speaking it than they ever will from me.

As Mrs. Almengor was changing Tucker's diaper, my husband overheard him say to her the following:

Tucker: "Is you gonna change my diaper?"

Mrs. A: "Si, hijito" (spanish for little son)

Tucker: "Is you gonna say 'oofa'?" (the spanish way of saying "p.u. or stinky")

To Love God More

I'm not sure what I want to write; I just know that I want to write something.
Writing is a way of processing for me, and so this post is mostly for myself. If any reader wants to read on, great. Hopefully, there'll be something encouraging for you, too.

I just spent the last several days caring for a dear friend and her family who have experienced great loss...Sweet, baby Livi went to be with the Lord after battling a rare form of Leukemia for more than a year. She was only 2 years old. Those 2 years went quickly, but they are filled with many wonderful memories of precious, fun times spent with her family and friends.

Only hours after Livi passed, I was hugging and crying with her mom in the kitchen of their home. Over the course of the weekend, I listened to many stories about Livi that brought both laughter and tears. I helped Emily go through her clothing, watched her bravely enter Livi's brand new room for the first time which her dad sacrificially prepared for her while she was in the hospital. I read Emily's drafted obituary for her daughter and corrected a misspelled word (What are friends for? Ironically, it was the word "friend" that was misspelled.)

I did some laundry, organized some shoes, brought some food and tissues. I drank some wine and cleaned some dishes. I met some of Emily's friends for the first time and re-acquainted myself with some of her extended family whom I have met in the past. I sat in silence. I also wept. I laughed and listened. I gave permission to be yelled at, kicked out, have things thrown at me or whatever. I just wanted to be there.

Some might find it difficult or uncomfortable to be around those who are grieving the death of a loved one, but I found it more difficult to not be there. I was reminded while there all weekend of the verse in Ecclesiastes 7:2, It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of every man; the living should take this to heart. I wanted to be near my dear friend and her family who are also so dear to my heart. I have to consider how much more God is desiring to be near to all of them right now; He is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

I spent time in Emily and James' home. I was also at the funeral home and the church where Livi was memorialized. In all those places, at various moments everything in me wanted to stand up and scream, "THIS ISN'T RIGHT! THIS SHOULDN'T BE HAPPENING." I can only imagine how much more Emily and James are feeling that right now. I know that death was not in God's original design. I know He created us to live forever. And while we still do live forever either in Heaven or Hell, we have to pass through the valley of the shadow of death. It feels permanent even though the separation is only temporary. And while we give thanks that one day we will see Livi again and we will be reunited, that temporary separation is so very painful. It leaves us with an ache in our bones almost and an empty feeling in Emily's arms. She wants to hold her baby. She wants to see her laugh again. She wants to care for her, plan for her days, love and cherish all the milestones. I want this for her, too.

At the same time I wanted to scream, I was praying all the while one prayer for myself, for Emily, James and their families. I was and am praying that somehow we will all love God MORE for this and even because of this. It is a prayer of faith because I cannot see how that can happen. I only know of God's power to redeem, to cause us to draw near to Him, to cause us to persevere in Him and to love Him more fully. Somehow, through the most tragic of life's circumstances, we come to know God and love God more deeply. Sometimes, the path that takes us to this place is quite circuitous, winding through bitterness, anger and despair before we come to the love, faith and hope. But, we get there. Why? Only because of God's faithfulness to His own, because of His relentless committment to our good, ultimately because of His unswerving, never faltering love for us.

What is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him? Even in the death of a very loved little girl, God is being mindful of us and not just mindful, but good. I know this even though I can't see how.

The New Look

I thought I would write about the reason behind the new look/new title. First, I'm still working on the new look. I'd like to get my husband's input and help with it because he's a lot better at that kind of thing than I am. But, this is what I did on my own, which for someone technologically disinclined, is pretty good I think! :)

The new title is first a practical move. The blog has morphed into an online journal about my whole life, not just updates on Judah's health as it once was. I now have three children, and I want to brag about all of them to the world. For those as technologically disinclined as myself (Gretchen), the address remains the same: http://www.judahupdate.blogspot.com/, so don't worry about changing that on your favorites list or RSS feed (is that right?...I mean bloglines and things like that). Only the title and look has changed.

The new title, "Pleasant Places" also comes from a verse that has become my life verse of sorts. I have found too often I'm tempted to look at my circumstances and doubt God's goodness. Anything as tragic as losing my father to brain cancer at age 12 to the less tragic but nevertheless heartbreaking incidents of unrequited loves (yes, there was sadly more than one).

I am constantly having to confront my sinful heart that seeks to compare my life and lot to others' lives and situations and accuse God of witholding good from me, or at least the best. I think, "my life is good, but it could be better." I play the "if only" game far too often. This verse has informed my thoughts and moved my heart on more than one occasion, bringing me to a place again and again of both surrender AND joy in all that my life is and all that it is not.

This one verse consistently says, "SHHH" to my disquieted heart that grumbles and complains. It reminds me of what is true, that truly God has placed the boundary lines of my life in pleasant places and that I do indeed have a delightful inheritance in Him.

A Busy Friday

I have a rather full day ahead of me tomorrow. In the morning, I'll be going to a friend's house to have a short play date. I'll be leaving Tucker with my friend in order to take Judah to Hopkins for a laser treatment. I'll also be taking Bella with me. My sister in law is meeting me at the hospital in order to watch Bella while I take Judah into the laser room. Then, we'll all head to her house so that I can feed Bella and wait for my husband to pick the kids up after work so that I can stay at my sister in law's house for a ladies' night she has planned. Lawrence, then, will have to pick up Tucker and has agreed to keep all three of the kids tomorrow evening so that I can enjoy a night out.

I'm tired just thinking about it!

Please pray for our family tomorrow....for Tucker who will be left with a "newer" friend of ours, for Judah to cooperate with all that's involved for his laser treatments, for Bella to be the flexible, "peach" of a daughter that she typically is, for Lawrence to receive much grace in his desire to bless me by keeping all the kids and for me, that I would not grow weary of crying out to God for His grace throughout the day because I know I'm going to need it in large measure tomorrow.

Please pray for our friend and her family as she has so willingly offered to keep Tucker while she has 4 of her own!

Thanks!

My Bella Girl

I recently took Bella for her 4 month check up. I can hardly believe she's already 4 months old! She's growing and changing so quickly, much faster than I remember the boys growing up. She is doing very well, per the pediatrician: in the 75% for weight at 14. 6 lbs, the 95% for height at almost 26 inches and is developmentally right on track. She giggles and coos, rolls over from belly to back, makes some serious eye contact, is very intent on studying people and loves her mommy most of all.

Because I do not yet have a baby book for her (classic 2nd child [really, 3rd child, but 2nd pregnancy for me] syndrome), I decided I would write some things down here on the blog to help me remember these days that are flying by.

We moved Bella to her own bedroom at 4 months old. Mommy was sad to see her go. She was my own personal sound machine. And, I was sad to see her in that big room all by herself. The boys have each other, and I have Lawrence. It doesn't seem right that she's all by herself. But, no announcements to make, I promise! :)

Bella is attached to her nuk, which is fine for now. It helps her sleep and be quiet when she's growing cranky which is seldom. Bella is a pretty happy baby for the most part. She has been getting up around 6 a.m. when I give her medicine for reflux or try to get her to go back to sleep. Usually, by 7 or 7:30, I give her the first feeding of the day. She's up with the boys and me until about 9/9:30 when she goes to bed for a morning nap. She's usually up again around 11:15/11:30, when she eats again and plays with the boys and me until we all go down for an afternoon nap around 1:30.

It is super nice to have that afternoon nap still, though it's hard to come by some days with the boys needing a lot of discipline to stay in their beds.

I have to give Bella her reflux meds. again around 2/2:30 and sometimes, this keeps her from getting a good nap in. Sometimes she'll go back to sleep, but other times she just spends the next hour or so fussing off and on until I finally wake her up for the 3rd feeding of the day.

After she nurses, I usually make dinner and enjoy some alone time with my girl while the boys still sleep (this is on a good day when the boys actually nap!). The boys wake up anywhere between 4 and 5 and I frantically try to keep my sanity while getting dinner together and wait for Papi to come home.

On a good day, Papi will be home by 5:15/5:30. We'll eat dinner together while Bella sits in her Bumbo seat on the table. Mommy cleans up while Papi plays with all the kiddos. Sometimes, we'll take walks as a family after dinner. Bedtime is around 7/7:30 for Bella and the boys are typically about a half hour behind her.

I have to wake her up again around 9:30 p.m. to give her reflux meds. and then I feed her about a half hour after that. Because she only eats 4 times a day at this point, all her feedings tend to be hearty ones (hearty for Bella anyway which means about 5-6 minutes on each side). Papi and Mommy get some alone time with just Bella which we have cherished. It's usually brief, but we love spending this time with just her. I put her down for the last time in the day and she sleeps through until the next morning. She has slept through the night since almost 7 weeks. I am very fortunate, I know.

Right now, she enjoys playing in her exersaucer, playing with her little duck wrist rattle, laying under her singing star on the playmat and most of all when mommy just spends time talking and playing with her. She loves her brothers and her brothers love her. They have done really well with her, are very gentle and attentive, sweet big brothers.

A quirky, little fact about Bella that I want to remember just in case it goes away: her hands and feet are always clammy.

We love our little, beautiful Bella!

My Son's a Genius!

I know, I've had this title before. But when one's told her son could be mentally retarded hours after he's born, she sort of appreciates any moments he proves to be anything but a little more than the average proud momma. Such was this morning.

As I encouraged Tucker to eat the apple he asked for, "Tucker, you must eat your apple before the timer goes off. You may drink your water with it....and so on," I hear Judah pipe up from the living room with, "Eat it with a goat!"

For a moment I was puzzled until I remembered we read Dr. Seuss's "Green Eggs and Ham" yesterday. :)

Judah's Follow Up

Judah's appointment was fine yesterday for the most part. He was unusually upset by being at the doctor's office. He grew upset as soon as we walked in the building and initially resisted letting the nurses triage him. Eventually, (like after he realized he would get a sticker if he was good), he warmed up to everyone, and we were fine.

Dr. Comi and I mostly talked in between checking Judah's reflexes, talking about his development and looking over his measurements. Not seeing her for more than 6 months, there were a few things to discuss: Judah's growth, the hypertrophy (swelling) on his face/arm, potential circulation issues, etc.

I am able to give thanks that Judah's situation is not really acute or emergent (as they say in hospital world), meaning there's nothing that needs to be done immediately. He's not really "sick" in the way we typically think of "sick". Yet, there are things going on in his body that will have an impact on his way of life, some things we can only guess might happen and other things we may not see coming at all.

It can be difficult at times to know how to proceed in Judah's care as most of the treatment for SWS is based on symptoms, a reactive approach rather than preventative. I spoke with Dr. Comi about this just to make sure that I was thinking correctly about Judah's syndrome. There is indeed, very little that can be done preventatively for SWS; it's mostly treated per symptoms. There are so many aspects of SWS that are simply not understood by the medical community to date. So much more research needs to happen.

What that means for Judah and for our family is this.
Judah COULD have growth hormone or thyroid issues. We are going to start bloodwork to find this out.
Judah COULD have trouble in the future with the hypertrophy, but we're hopeful that laser treatments will help with this or that he just won't have the kind of trouble that some folks afflicted with SWS have.
Judah COULD have a like syndrome known as Klippel Trenaunay Syndrome which would affect his arms/legs, but we need to do further imaging to find out.

I walked out of the dr.'s office yesterday again crying out to God for wisdom. I don't know what tests to subject my son to and what tests can wait or not be done at all. I don't know what experimental supplementations to possibly try and what ones won't be necessary or might actually harm him. I don't know what information to seek out and what is better left unknown. Sometimes, I don't know how aggressively I should invest time, money, energy, etc. into gaining all the knowledge out there on SWS, knowing that it's man's wisdom, and that seems to change with time. What was recommended 10 years ago is quite different than what might be recommended today.

I walk away from these appointments and conversations tempted to feel very vulnerable and insecure about taking care of my child. But, I have to continually remind myself that God has promised to teach me and instruct me in the way I should go. He has promised me His Holy Spirit to be my guide. He has promised to grant me wisdom lavishly without finding fault if I simply ask Him and believe that He will be true to His promise.

SO, I have a couple lab slips, other doctors' phone numbers to call in order to set up further imaging for Judah. I have a list of things to bring up with our pediatrician. And, I am where I often don't like to be but where I most intimately come to know Lord: completely dependent upon Him to tell me what to do, to look out for me, for Judah and for our family, to once again show Himself strong and faithful and good to us.

We may not have "emergent" needs for Judah, but we certainly have needs. And, as always we covet your prayers as we seek to do our best in caring for our child and glorifying God with the lot He has assigned to us.

A doctor's appointment

I know we haven't had one in a while! Actually, we have had some appointments for Bella and things are looking good for her. I will post another time about her progress.

Tomorrow, I am taking Judah to the neurologist for a follow up visit. We now see her every 6 months which for us seems like an eternity between visits. I'm grateful for this; it's a sign that Judah is doing well. :) But, there are a few things that I need to discuss with her. Judah's syndrome is such that most of his health needs, for Judah anyway, don't tend to be emergent. They are nevertheless present and need to be addressed.

I need to bring up Judah's growth with her again, see how he's tracking in the charts and what we want to decide if need be about growth hormone testing. I have some concerns about his circulation and the hypertrophy I continue to see on his face, neck and one arm. And, we will most likely be scheduling a follow up CT Scan to see that his shunt is working appropriately.

Our appointment is at 10 a.m., and I will be leaving both Tucker and Bella with my mother in law. Hopefully, Bella will just be sleeping while I'm away, and the visit won't run too long so that I can get back in time to nurse Bella.

We would appreciate your prayers for tomorrow's visit, and I'll try to let you know how things go soon.

A Father's Grace

Grace: a disposition to kindness and compassion
Mercy: compassionate or kindly forbearance shown toward an offender...

There are many ways I could honor my dad today, but I want to share a story in which my dad exemplified these two words to me in an unforgettable way.

When I was in highschool, I worked at a local dairy scooping icecream among other duties. One night, I was leaving to drive home and backed up into my co-worker's new Toyota 4 Runner. I don't remember it doing a whole lot of damage to her car, but the tail light of my dad's minivan came off along with some other structural damage. I was so upset about it and wished that my quick 5 minute drive home could have been longer to prolong the announcement I'd have to make to my parents when I got home.

When I arrived home, I walked into our dining room where my parents were jointly working on the budget adding insult to injury to my forthcoming announcement. Dejected, I threw the tail light onto the table and waited for the lecture to begin. What followed I will never forget. My dad calmly asked what happened, a tone of compassion in his voice rather than the irritation I expected to hear. Once he heard what happened, he said something like, "Don't worry about it. It'll get taken care of." Then, he reached in his back pocket and pulled out a 10 dollar bill, threw it down on the table and told me to go get some pizza with friends and forget about it for a little while.

Do not be mistaken. My dad always sought to make us responsible and not cover for our mistakes. But, my dad saw in this moment that I was certainly disposed to do what was right and pay for the damages myself. He saw that there was a greater lesson to be learned that night, not one of responsibility, but of grace and mercy. He sought (whether intentional or not) to teach me what it means to receive something we don't deserve.

That incident forever became a tangible picture to me of God's love for me. God, in His mercy and grace, gave me the gift of His Son's death to pay for my sins, when I did not deserve it.

Since then, I have cost my dad much money, even recently when I again crashed his truck trying to get out of a parking garage. Stuck on the fourth floor of the garage, I called my dad crying and fearful that I would never be able to get his truck out of the garage. True to his character and love for me, he only sought to care for me, calming me down and giving me a strategy to get the truck out of the garage.

Dad, there are so many things I could say to honor you. Today, I'm choosing to focus on one thing that has made a profound impact on not only feeling secure in your love for me but also in God's love for me. You have been a picture of my Heavenly Father in these incidents and others. Thank you for giving me that precious gift. Happy Father's Day!

Need Some Help

My near 3 yr. old boys cannot for the life of them seem to figure out how to blow their nose. I feel like I've tried many things to teach them the concept of blowing OUT of their nose. They don't get it. Are they too young or am I missing something in my instruction?
Any suggestions?

Zone Out, Freak Out or Cry Out

Recognize this scene?

Multiple people needing you all at the same time. Most, if not all of them are not asking but demanding your attention, lacking gratitude for your service and thinking they are entitled to all you have to offer them because they are, after all, the center of the world. Of course, I'm being a bit dramatic here for effect, but you get the picture.

Maybe you're a teacher to 2nd graders or better yet, pre-schoolers! Maybe you work under multiple bosses (like my husband) who don't always communicate with each other the entirety of their expectations of you. Maybe, like me, you're a mom of several children who daily require much attention and energy.

Whatever your position, I think most people at some point in their lives find themselves in this type of stressful situation. I found myself there tonight (and really, almost any night at our house these days). All three children managing to need me at the same time while my husband is fixing to go do some work out in the back yard. I looked at my husband and actually said, "If I don't zone out right now, I'm going to freak out." Now there's a godly response for you! :)

My gracious and oh so patient husband quickly ushered 2 of our 3 children to the van for an after dinner drive to leave me to some peace (and probably hoping I'd get it together for once!).
This may sound strange to some of you, but to be left to a quiet house where I can clean without interruptions brings me peace. Should it? Who knows. But, it does. However, this time, the Holy Spirit whispered in my ear, "Washing your dishes right now might bring you peace in the moment but it is not going to help you when those boys walk through the door in about a half hour. You need ME."

So, I put down my sponge and went to read my Bible. It dawned on me that when I said, "If I don't zone out right now, I'm going to freak out," I was convinced those were the only two options for me in that moment. I had forgotten a third option and really, the only option if I am seeking to glorify God in the midst of tempation. That was to cry out to God. I went searching God's Word for promises made to those who cry out to God and here's what I found.

Psalm 34:17
When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.

I thought of the many troubles I have found myself in over the years: some big troubles, some not so big troubles. But for every one, the Lord has heard and delivered me when I've called out to Him for help. It has not always been easy. In fact, I find I often have to apply much effort to take my thoughts captive to believe the truth and to act upon God's truth, and then my emotions eventually change even if the circumstance doesn't. Sometimes, however, God has delivered me from the very thing that is troubling me and in some way or another provides very tangible relief.

So, I went back to my dishes asking God for help. Not long after, the boys all walked back thru the front door, and I was tested again. My hubby asked me to do bedtime with the boys, which at our house can be like herding cattle into the barn at night, a very slow and laborious process. I took a deep breath (sad, isn't it that this opportunity to love on two little boys presents temptation for me), asked God for help and got the boys ready for bed.

Tonight, even as I post this I have another opportunity to cry out to God as I hear both my boys screaming from their bedroom. They need me AGAIN! My husband's needs me to take care of it so that he can attend to other things. I will cry out to God for help to serve all my men; He will hear me and once again deliver me from all my "troubles".

Cilantro Anyone?

I bought a bunch of cilantro on Saturday for a recipe I tried last night which was very good. I have a lot of cilantro left over and wanted to offer it to anyone who thinks they might use it this week. I don't think I'll use it all before it goes bad. SO, any locals want some of my cilantro?

I will even provide the recipe I used it for, and if you want to try it, you'll have the cilantro to go with it. :)

From Cooking Light:

Spiced Chicken Thighs with Yogurt Sauce

1 cup uncooked couscous (which I didn't have and didn't use)
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1 teaspoon ground coriander (I didn't have this on hand)
1 teaspoon ground turmeric (I didn't have this either)
1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground red pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt, divided
8 skinless, boneless chicken thighs (about 1 1/2 lbs)
Cooking Spray
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
1 teaspoon bottled minced garlic (I used fresh)
1 (6 oz.) carton plain fat free yogurt
Cilantro sprigs (optional)

Cook couscous according to package directions, omitting salt and fat. (Obviously, this recipe is fine without the couscous, or you could use rice as well.)

Combine cumin and next 4 ingredients (through pepper) in a bowl; stir in 1/4 tsp. salt. Sprinkle spice mixture over chicken. Heat a large nonstick skillet over medium heat. Coat pan with cooking spray (I used olive oil). Add chicken to pan; cook 6 minutes on each side or until done.

Combine remaining 1/4 tsp. salt, chopped cilantro, garlic and yogurt in a bowl, stirring well. Serve with chicken and couscous. Garnish with cilantro sprigs if desired.

IF any locals want my cilantro, leave a comment in my comment box.

A Moving Sale

Sadly, our good friends, Aaron and Lori Chambers are moving within the next month. They are hoping to sell most of their furniture rather than haul it with them. I wanted to direct any of my readers to a blog Lori set up to advertise their stuff. Feel free to ask any questions at that blog as I won't really be able to answer any of them myself. FYI: The furniture is currently in Baltimore, so any of my long distance friends may not be interested.

The blog is: http://chambersmovingsale.wordpress.com/

The Greatest Comfort

• a friend who just lost her aunt
• another friend whose husband found himself in the ER with a ruptured appendix
• a third friend whose 2 yr. old precious, little girl is fighting for her life in the hospital with Leukemia (please pray for Alivia)
• a conflict with my husband
• other friends who are discouraged by the challenges their newborns are giving them
• a catty competition with a caricature of a woman who most likely doesn't exist
• a client my husband's firm might acquire which would mean a 2nd busy season this summer
• a limited food budget I've got to stay within to feed a family of 5 and no inspiration to cook
• whether to put my children into their sunday school class and risk having them get sick (which has happened almost EVERY time we've done so this calendar year)
• failing to respond to emails and phone calls, feeling like a failure of a friend
• even seeing dirt under my sons' fingernails too many days in a row

All these things and more have served to disquiet my heart this week.

So often recently, I have walked around with a low grade agitated spirit. I find myself short tempered with my children, not tolerating my husband's sin, and scurrying around trying to meet the needs of others in my own strength. In my disquieted state, I've tried to hush my mind and heart with many things: writing more to do lists, reading a plethora of cookbooks for inspiration to feed my family, assessing the needs of others and offering to meet those needs without really prayerfully considering whether I am the one to meet those needs, giving advice, making phone calls and lots of apologies. All these things, while not necessarily wrong in themselves, have not served to ultimately quiet my heart.

There is only one thing that has consistently hushed my tumultuous, emotion driven thoughts, and that is the gospel. Only when I've taken time to come back to the gospel truths has my heart truly been at peace. When I've listened to worship songs that declare these truths to me:

I will glory in my Redeemer
Whose priceless blood has ransomed me...
Who crushed the power of sin and death

Or

The Lord is not our equal
He doesn't need the help of man
Who could ever give Him counsel
Who could ever stop His Sovereign plan...

He punishes the wicked
Pours judgment out on sin
Yet this Champion of Justice
Is a Savior if you call on Him.

My heart has been comforted by God's Word that also tells me of God's kindness and provision to me through the gospel:

Teach me your way, O LORD,
and I will walk in your truth;
give me an undivided heart,
that I may fear your name.

I will praise you, O Lord my God, with all my heart;
I will glorify your name forever.

For great is your love toward me;
you have delivered me from the depths of the grave.
Ps. 86:11-13

I've tried many things to quiet my heart, but only one thing consistently works: the gospel truths. God's word is again proven true: "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you." Isaiah 26:3

The Latest and Greatest

There seems to be a million things my boys do or say in one day that make me laugh. I can never remember all of them nor relay them in a way that is quite as funny as when it took place. But, as much as I can, I want to remember some of their antics.

This weekend, we were able to spend time up in PA at my parent's house. It was wonderful to be with them again, some of my sibs seeing Bella for the first time since she was born. The boys haven't slept in pack-n-plays for several months, and I have dragged my feet on transitioning them to big boy beds. Yes, they'll soon be 3 and still in cribs. I'm ambitious with so many things, but when it comes to these motherhood/child milestones, I tend to crawl under a rock and hope I don't ever have to face reality. :)

My first mistake was thinking the boys would sleep only an hour or so after we arrived to grandma's. I should have known that first day would be a wash with how excited they were to be there. Nevertheless, I thought I'd try to put them down for a nap. All my kiddos were down for their nap, so I decided to take a walk with my mom. We were gone for maybe a half hour to 45 minutes. When I came back, Lawrence said the boys were up and had already received some discipline for jumping into each other's pack-n-play, throwing trucks at each other and biting each other! Lawrence asked if he could go out with my dad now that I was back, and I thought, "Well the boys have had several spankings from their papi, I'm sure they'll go to sleep at this point." So, I confidently sent my husband off to enjoy an outing with my dad.

The boys did not go to sleep, but they were being quiet. I walked past their bedroom at one point and heard them talking to each other. I vacillated whether to spank them again for talking (they're not allowed to during naptime at home) or to just be happy they weren't killing each other and let them talk. I decided to let them talk, but then stopped to listen for just a second to hear what they were saying. Tucker: "Judah, you want paper? I'll give you some paper. Here..." I thought, "Ah, how cute. They're playing office."

And, then the more experienced mom part of my brain decided to wake up and told me that I had better take a peek to see if somehow they had gotten into any of my dad's work supplies because they were set up in his office. I opened the door and saw that Tucker had climbed into Judah's pack-n-play AGAIN and somehow managed to open one of my dad's office drawers. Paper clips were everywhere. The stapler was out, my dad's compass, pens, pencils, etc. I turned right around and walked out to laugh. I couldn't keep myself composed. I also invited my mom to witness their little role playing scene and then went back in to verbally correct them. We got it all cleaned up and gave up on the nap. Later on during dinner, I had them apologize to grandpa for getting into his things.

I know this is just a foreshadowing of things to come. Any other moms of multiple kiddos have funny, frightening stories?!

God Speaks

Ever know that God is speaking to you undeniably about something very specific in your life? I had one of those moments this morning. Two friends of mine, separately shared with me what they read in their quiet times this morning. Well, both "happened" to have read the SAME verse: Proverbs 25:28 which says, A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.

I actually wept when I read the 2nd email and saw the same verse. I must confess I wept not only because God was kind to speak so specifically to me this morning, but also because of what I knew God was speaking to me about.

Let me explain. Several things have culminated this week to direct my thoughts toward an area where I indulge my flesh and that is in the area of foods, more specifically what I would consider "snacks". I have been growing exasperated with my boys for asking for 'treats' all day long until one day this week God reminded me that I am no different. I want treats all day long, too, and because I'm the mommy, I have the prerogative to indulge that craving more than I allow the boys to do the same. Also, somehow this month, I spent the entire food budget by the 20th of May! SO, it is Mother Hubbard over here, and our cuboards are bare...not a whole lot to choose from in the "treat" category.

Finally, we are planning a trip to my parents this weekend about which I'm very excited. This trip will be a little different, however, as my mom was recently diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes. So, where there was always a plethora of yummy, sugary treats to be had at my mom's, there will now be none. I found myself actually contemplating how I would go the entire weekend without a sugary snack. Isn't that pathetic? Perhaps, but certainly signs of a bit of an addiction at worst, preoccupation at best.

At the same time, God was revealing to me my pre-occupation/addiction to sugar, He was also laying before me a few things that I really want more than I want to be immediately gratified. Our church is currently seeking to raise funds to pave our parking lot. It's in desperate need. Lawrence and I really want to give as much as we can to this effort. But, as we don't typically have excess in our budget, we know it will require discipline and sacrifice on our part to be able to give what we, in our hearts, want to give and feel we're being led to give. In addition, we also desire to grow in extending hospitality, in having money to be able to meet the needs of others when they're presented to us. We don't have an endless supply of income (nobody does really), so we know that in order to receive the blessing of giving, we need to sow with discipline and sacrifice when it comes to our own desires to indulge.

For me, for today, it means giving up my "treats" for a little while. :) I also want to grow in conquering this compulsion to snack on sugary treats because I know it will reap benefits in other areas of my life, making room for God to truly be my everything, to be the One who satisfies me like nothing else. I know, however, that I cannot simply resolve to deny my flesh; although resolve certainly does help. I know that I can do nothing good apart from God's Spirit empowering me. So, this morning as I wept like a child who knows he has to give up his toy to his brother and really doesn't want to, I also wept because I know God stands ready and able to give me the power to not only give up what He's asking me to, but also to do so with joy and find that the replacement, God Himself, will be much more satisfying.

Smoky Chicken Corn Cakes

I tried a new recipe recently, and it was a hit! I thought I would share it with you. My husband's family is from Guatemala, and apparently it resembles a dish familiar to their culture. It comes from Real Simple magazine, May 2007 issue.

1-- 3 1/2- 4 lb. rotisserie chicken (I used a 3 lb. chicken, and it was fine)
1 Tablespoon chopped canned chipotle chilies in adobo sauce*
3 Tablespoons fresh lime juice
1 tsp. kosher salt
1 small red onion, thinly sliced
4 Roma (plum) tomatoes, diced
1/3 c. fresh cilantro leaves (I omitted this b/c I have a white girl's palate)
1/2 c. flour
1/2 c. yellow cornmeal
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. black pepper
4 large eggs
1 c. part-skim ricotta
10 oz. frozen corn, thawed
2 tsp. canola oil
1/2 cup sour cream (optional) OR parmesan cheese (our topping of choice)

Using a fork or your fingers, shred chicken meat, discarding the skin and bones. In a medium bowl, combine the meat, chipotle, lime juice, 1/4 tsp. of the salt, the onion, tomatoes, and cilantro; set aside. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, cornmeal, baking powder, pepper, and the remaining salt. Stir in the eggs and ricotta until no lumps remain. Fold in the corn. Heat the oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium heat. For each corn cake, spoon about 1/4 cup of the batter onto the skillet and cook until golden brown and set on one side, 2 to 3 minutes. Using spatula, flip the cakes and cook 1 minute more. Divide the cakes among individual plates and top with the chicken mixture. Serve with sour cream, if desired (or we prefer parmesan cheese).

*You can find these in the mexican food or international food section of your grocery store. Once you open the can, you can store them in a sealed container in the fridge for a very long time without them going bad. Thank you, Lori Chambers for turning me on to chipotle peppers in adobo sauce!

Pictures with a Story

Two weekends ago, we had a very busy weekend...a full day at Hopkins, and two birthday parties to attend. The 2nd birthday party of the weekend was on Sunday, right after church and at the same time the boys normally take a nap. It was not a good showing for the Almengor's. We were with old neighbors of ours who we haven't seen in months. We were the only family with three kids, let alone three kids under 3 years old.

Shortly after we arrived, Judah fell and cut his lip open rather badly. At the time, we couldn't decipher what he had cut; we just saw the blood. Any mom knows facial bleeds are the worst, especially the mouth. It seemed to take forever to get it to stop bleeding and even longer to get Judah to stop crying. I'm sure after a half hour, people were wondering why we were even still at the party. But, hey, we don't come by social events that the entire family can attend too often. So, I was determined to stick it out!

Judah did calm down and eventually began to play again with the other kids, but he fell at least 3 or 4 more times that day. Not his day I guess. Tucker was in true 2 yr. old form, saying "no" to me any time I called his name, and Bella refused to sleep making her rather cranky and unable to put down. We really weren't able to participate with any of the planned activities because we were just a bit overwhelmed. My friend who hosted the party said to me at one point during the party, "I'm exhausted just watching you." :) Yeah, just the thing that makes you feel like such a good mommy! :) I just smiled and said, "yeah, I'm not one of those who makes it look easy."

I am the mom I never wanted to be: the frazzle, dazzle queen. But, I've got three kids I love a ton and three kids who, God willing, will learn to be incredibly gracious to others who, like their momma, fumble through life while trying real hard to make it look good.

Here are the pictures of Judah's lip later that day when all the blood stopped flowing and he stopped crying:


And, here's a very tired mommy at the day's end who was attacked by plastic eggs while she slept:

Some New Favorites

I thought I'd post some new favorite photos I recently had developed of the kiddos. Bella is about 2 1/2 months in these photos and the boys are about 4 months shy of turning 3.


She is definitely more than a tax deduction, but given that she has a CPA for a daddy makes that shirt all the more hilarious, doesn't it?!





Can you guess which one's Judah and which is Tucker? :)

Perception vs. Reality

Because we have a son with SWS, Lawrence and I have become apart of the Sturge-Weber Foundation . We receive a newsletter from them a couple times a year called, Branching Out. In it's most recent publication, there was an article entitled, "Perception vs. Reality" written by Rhonda Finley, mom of a child with SWS, Ryan. I wanted to post it here as I felt it captures so well how Lawrence and I feel about our lot with Judah.

SWF [Sturge-Weber Foundation] Partners were asked to send us their observations and experiences on the perceptions the general public, friends and acquaintances have revealed to them and how it matches with the lives they are living.

One thing I hear a lot is "Wow...I don't know how you do it. I could never handle a child with so many disabiliites. I couldn't do it. You must be so strong. " My standard answer is something like, "I didn't have this child because I'm strong. I became strong through my child. And guess what---you too would become strong if he were your child. It's not a choice; it's a responsibility driven by a powerful love."

It's amazing how, as a parent of a child with SWS [Sturge Weber Syndrome], KTS [Klippel Trenaunay Syndrome] and PWS [Port Wine Stain], we learn to be very assertive, deal with adversity, almost on a daily basis (every time you take your child to the grocery store for example) and become the advocate you never thought you could. We were forced out of our comfort zones, stepped out of our protective coating and learned how to deal with the world as it comes at us, sometimes it's hard and fast and it hurts.

The decisions we face are no less than surreal--do we increase the medication, change a medication or is it time to cut some of our child's brain out?* Will that help? Will he survive? How will this affect our lives? The funny thing is no one can answer those questions. At the same time, we learn how wonderful life really is. Each step, every word, all the laughter and smiles, the hugs and kisses, the normal challenges of everyday things---these things are special. I believe we have an increased awareness and appreciation for what most people take for granted. This is what I would tell the public.

*a hemispherectomy is the removal of a part of the brain which is done in SWS patients whose seizures are uncontrollable otherwise and for whom the benefits of such a surgery outweigh the risks. Thankfully, we have not had to come close to facing this possibility for Judah as he seems to have no brain involvement to date.

As challenging and exhausting it can be to care for Judah at times in regards to his SWS, we give thanks that it is not as hard as it could be. God has shown us much mercy; nevertheless, what we do face has produced in us a greater appreciation for all we see Judah and our other children learning and accomplishing. We have only to give thanks.

Who's Testing Who?

James 1:2, 3 says, "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness."

So often when I'm walking through "trials of various kinds", I only feel that I am the one being tested. God is testing me in order to bring about steadfastness and other Christ-like character. While this is true, this morning God provided a different perspective on trials. When we walk through trials, it is not only we who are being tested; it is also God and His Word that are being tested and as I have found, always proven true.

Last week I found myself in the midst of a trial, the trial of caring for sick kids. Tucker woke up one night with diarrhea and vomiting. We were up with him several times throughout the night, did 3 loads of laundry before the night was over, gave several baths, and was even up to greet the sunrise this morning. It wasn't a cheery greeting, mind you. This was all after caring for Judah for the three days who had also had the stomach bug.

One morning as I tried to prepare myself for the long day ahead of me, my husband having a networking event in the evening, I began to think about putting God's Word to the test. I thought of these particular promises found in scripture:

For nothing will be impossible with God. Luke 1:37

I can do all things through him who strengthens me. Phil. 4:13

...but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;they shall mount up with wings like eagles;they shall run and not be weary;they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

My prayer that morning went something like this, "God, this is what your Word says, so let me see you come through today. Let me see you be true to Your Word." Now, while this may sound and can be the prayer of a cynic, by the power of the Holy Spirit I was able to offer it as a prayer of faith, knowing that God would be up for the challenge, so to speak.

When we're walking through trials of various kinds, remember we are not the only ones being put to the test. God and His Word is being put to test, and you will find it is an opportunity to see the faithfulness of God and certainty of His Word.

Why One Should Not Bother Cleaning Her Windows with Toddlers in the Home:

Besides the obvious: their fingerprints end up all over the window only seconds to minutes after you've cleaned it making this a very futile endeavor, there's the less than obvious but very real possibility of one child spraying the other child in the face with the Windex that's left on the stairs to be taken upstairs on the next trip. Yes, I had a bad mommy moment today, but don't we all?!

I did leave the Windex within reach of my two near 3 yr. old boys, one of whom (will remain unnamed) sprayed the other in the eyes. For your reference, Windex is seemingly rather harmless when sprayed in the eyes with it per the Windex company people, but if your child has eye issues, you may want to call your eye doctor just to make sure no further action is necessary. (Guess that little bit of information gives away who sprayed who, huh?!) :)

All parties involved in our little incident today seem to be fine, but this momma is going to think twice next time she gets the compulsion to clean her windows. What was I thinking?!

The Stomach Bug Strikes Again

Yes, it's true. It seems we've picked up a stomach bug again. Judah had diarrhea all morning and just threw up during his nap. I was really hoping it was just all the sugar he ate this weekend at the birthday parties, but the throwing up part makes me think it's more likely some virus. And, given we were all over Hopkins on Friday (just about the easiest place to pick up viruses/illnesses of all kinds), I'm thinking we got it from there.

The unfortunate thing is that we probably exposed just about as many families as we could this weekend, having attended two birthday parties with the kids and church on Sunday. Of course, there was no way to anticipate that Judah would be sick today, but I still feel really badly for having exposed people to him. If you happen to have seen us this weekend and your kids get sick, I'm really sorry. Don't hate us forever! :)

So, into hiding we go again. Of course, we'd appreciate your prayers for our health, and that by a miracle, the rest of us would remain healthy, especially Bella. Please pray that those who were exposed to my kids this weekend would not get sick either.

Thanks so much.

God's Kindness in the Details

I'm not sure if it's just that I'm getting used to craziness of our life as normal or if God was especially kind to us today (probably a combination of both), but today went so much better than good. At times throughout the day, I almost felt like I was floating, like God was just lifting me above the circumstances and allowing me to float through the day. It's really indescribable, but His presence and providence was so evident to me all day long.

It started by the fact that we got three kids out the door BEFORE I even had planned to be out the door this morning. Three separate diaper bags packed, three kids and two adults fed breakfast, two asthma treatments administered and diapers changed all before 9:30 a.m. I even walked out with makeup on and my hair done!!! In our house, this is nothing short of truly amazing!

We could tell Tucker was picking up on the fact that he was going to be left behind today, and that was seriously tugging at my heart. From the get go, we threw ourselves on God's mercy, petitioning Him for wisdom to help shepherd our son's heart through circumstances that are not common to most 2 1/2 yr. old little boys. We prayed as a family right before we dropped Tucker off and felt confident that God would remain true to His promise to 'go before and come behind us' today, making all kinds of provision where needed.

Tucker ended up doing very well with the sitter, friends of ours, the Kilbanes (thank you, guys!!), who have two little buddies around his age. He obeyed very well, took his nap and seemed rather well adjusted when we picked him up at the end of the day. Thank you, Lord!!

My traffic savvy husband averted a major backup on I-95 and managed to get us in the city with time to spare....so much time that we were even able to stop at a city park (a very nice city park) to give Judah some time to play!

We made Bella's appointment on time and did not have to wait very long before we were seen. All the while, Judah was such a pleasant companion, sitting still in the waiting room, eating his goldfish and reading his book. Our visit with the laryngologist was reassuring in the respect that he saw nothing in his exam of Bella or looking over the notes on her that alarmed him. He feels that as long as we are able to keep the reflux under control and continue to see her grow, we should be fine just waiting on time to make her airway stronger.

The endoscopy was not fun. She screamed like a crazy woman, but it was over very quickly and I did not have to hold her down as a nurse was called in for that. She calmed down soon after I was able to hold her and was an absolute peach the rest of the day. She was such a good girl, sleeping most of the rest of the afternoon, that I forgot to change her diaper ALL day!! This proved to be the only snag in the day as when I pulled her out of her carseat once we were home, I saw that she had a major poop thru, all the way up to her armpit...poor girl. Bad mommy. :(

Bella's appointment went so well and so quick that we were able to take a somewhat leisurely lunch with Judah in the outpatient cafeteria. Judah even got french fries which I'm sure made his day. Prior to lunch, we had to apply the numbing cream which went so much better than it has gone many times in the past. For a while, I had given up outlining the area to be worked on with a highlighter because Judah would just flip out on me. But, today we were able to talk to him, make it fun, and he allowed me to outline the area on his face that was to be lasered. Lawrence and I worked together to get the cream on, and Judah did rather well with that, too.

He probably looked like a burn victim to anyone who saw us, but we just don't seem to notice the stares much anymore. We ate our lunch, found a fun little patio to play on for a little while and even had enough time to walk from the outpatient building to the new children's outpatient clinic a few blocks away where Judah's appointment was. God not only provided a beautiful day so that we could walk, but also the time we needed AND a construction site where a bunch of dump trucks, bulldozers and cranes were working for Judah to enjoy on the way. It was at this point that I was so struck with God's kindness to us in the details of our day that I began to tear up.

I had been dreading these appointments all week, had a restless night's sleep last night and drove down to Hopkins still battling anxiety even after we had prayed as a family. Several times today, in the midst of just doing what is "normal" life to me, I was struck by how not normal our life is. Whether that was the enemy devising to discourage me or my own sinful flesh looking to feel sorry for myself, who knows? But, God met me and encouraged my heart so greatly by showing His kindness to us in the details.

When we arrived at the outpatient clinic for Judah's appointment, he realized that it was his turn to see the doctor. At one point, he looked at Lawrence and me and said, "It's my turn to be brave." Well, as you can imagine, I wanted to lose it. My little man is so consistently a picture to me of God's amazing grace, as I see God providing so much strength and contentment to Judah to walk out the lot God has assigned to him.

And, brave he was. Each time we go for laser treatments, Judah makes it a little further into the appointment before he starts to cry. He used to cry when he saw the doctor. Today, he was giving him high fives. Then, we could make it to the laser room before he'd start to cry; today he was exploring the 'new' room. Today, he made it all the way to laying down on the table before he started to scream. By the time I saw him in the waiting room, he was all smiles with lollipop in hand, being commended by the nurse.

Before I knew it, we were on our way home, another dreaded day behind us. And, all I could say was, "Thank you, Lord".

A Real Doozy

We have a real doozy of a day tomorrow. We will be taking Bella and Judah to Hopkins for dr's appointments. At 11:20 a.m., Bella will see a laryngologist who will take a scope through her nose and down her throat to see if her airway defect (laryngo/tracheomalacia) has improved at all since birth. Needless to say, I'm not so thrilled to be subjecting my little girl to such a procedure, but we feel it's what is best. She had this done while in the NICU at Hopkins, but we weren't there to witness it. Tomorrow, I will remain by her side, praying the entire time. She will not be put under anesthesia which I'm grateful for in one respect and wish otherwise in another. I will comfort myself with the thought that she will not remember any of this.

As for Judah, he has a laser treatment on his face. His appointment is at 2:30. Numbing cream needs to be applied at 12:30, 2 hours ahead of the treatment. If you haven't noticed, it's going to be a little tight tomorrow, but thankfully Lawrence will be coming with me to help ensure we can pull it off.

Laser appointments are never fun; Judah always screams. I'm not sure how he'll do having the cream applied somewhere in transit tomorrow...whether in the car, in the outpatient clinic bathroom or somewhere else. He's been doing so well with his other doctor's appointments, but I think it'll take him much longer to willingly subject himself to the laser treatments.

Please pray that:

• Our day will be characterized by many evidences of God's grace and mercy.
• Bella will be well enough to have the scope done (she just started with a cold).
• Bella will cooperate (as much as a 3 month old can) with the procedure and that her airway will be improved since birth.
• Judah will allow Lawrence to apply the numbing cream and cooperate with the laser treatment.
• Judah will have minimal if any bruising/blisters from the treatment.
• All appointments will run on time and we'll be able to get to Judah's laser appt. on time. His laser Tx is in a different building than Bella's procedure.

God willing, if everything goes well enough, we have a fun weekend for the kids ahead of us. We have a little buddy's 1st birthday party on Saturday to attend and another friend's 4th birthday party to attend on Sunday. Getting birthday cake two days in a row is like dying and going to Heaven for my little buddies. So, I'm hoping we'll be able to swing it!!

Thanks for praying.

Our Morning Excitement

(MOM...Don't read this post; trust me!)


Our friend and neighbor, Rudy, came over to play a little bit this morning, and on his way out the front door, he spotted something in our flower beds that looked interesting to him. His mom was putting her other child, Lucy, in the stroller and turned around to notice Rudy crouching down to "pet" something. That something was a snake! (Mom, I told you not to read this.)

I was puzzled when Heather didn't whisk Rudy away from the thing but instead gently pulled Rudy back to create a little distance and then allowed him to stare at the thing for minutes. She said she didn't want him to be afraid. So, given the fact that I have two boys who do tend to be more timid with such things, I thought I should follow her good example and have the boys go outside to see this bit of nature, too.

We all remained a safe distance from the snake, not knowing what kind it was. After a few minutes we decided our boys had had their little science lesson for the day, and we could all go inside now. When I emailed my husband to tell him about it, he asked me to call my father-in-law over to get the snake out of our bush. So, I called and over he came with a long log, a long pole and an intention to get that snake.

When he saw that it wasn't a simple black snake, he decided he was going to kill it and that he needed my help. "Me, you want ME to help you...to help you kill a .....snake?! Surely, you're joking" is what I thought to myself. But, again to set the example to my boys of bravery, I pitched in and helped my FIL get that snake. He had me hold the log down tightly on its tale while he took the pole to get its head out of the bush. I'll not share any more details but to say the snake is now dead and sitting in a clear trash bag on our deck so that Lawrence can look it up later on the internet to see what kind of snake we had in our bush just in case any of its brothers or sisters decide to show up at our house for vengeance. :0

Growing Up

To say we have picky eaters is an understatement. Oh, I know every toddler is a picky eater, but mine have elimated entire food groups from their diet....like meat (and "real" meat anyway)and veggies. Most fruits get the cut as well, but they will occasionally surprise me. And, what they do eat, they don't necessarily eat much of. This morning, though, they gave me a glimpse into the season I know is coming: the teen years when boys, no matter how picky, eat like a horse! I know because I watched four of my brother eat my mom out of house and home! I was amazed at how much they could pack in, and often just as a snack!

This morning, the boys ate an entire bowl of oatmeal, an entire piece of toast, 2 spoonfuls of peanut butter (a food they've only recently accepted) and a sippy of milk!!! They must be growing.

And, on the note of growing up, I've been hearing Tucker call me "mom" instead of "mommy" lately. It's sort of making me sad, and even though I know I should just let him address me in this more 'grown up' way, there's a part of me that wants to ask him to please still call me "mommy". :)