So, let's just say this happens at your house, too...
You're upstairs and you hear screaming downstairs. You know it's your two children fighting again. One is suspiciously quiet while the other is screaming at the top of his/her lungs. What do you do?
Do you always run down and address it?
Do you discipline both no matter what?
Do you let them figure it out on their own as long as no one is getting hurt?
Or some other bright idea I haven't yet thought of?
7 comments:
I grab a bowl of popcorn, sit back and watch WRESTLEMANIA in my living room. Front row seat :)
call the sitter and head out to Starbucks!!! :)
I'm not the "always" type of anything. I would opt for letting them figure it out if no one's getting hurt. The quiet one may be to blame, but the loud one usually gets it. Hard to tell when you're not there. Their sins will find them out; you don't always have to go searching for 'em!
I once read that if you interfere too much, then it becomes more about getting parents' attention. I interefere at times, especially when my oldest son is begin cruel--- but with our twins, I feel like they are on an equal playing field (except, Jack won't defend himself) -- much of the time if I endure the screaming, the event eventually blows over. At times, I do give a time-out to the one who is usually the bully (Drew) if I feel like he needs correction and is at fault in the situation (most of the time, it is hard to get an accurate assesment on who started it all -- probably mostly mutual). :) Robin
You got some great comments here...I am with Peg on the sitter and Starbucks ;) On a serious note. At your boys ages I usually let them work it out if there is no bllod involved. As my boys got older I sent them outside...seriously. If they wanted to fight the rule was they had to take it outside so my housr and sanity were not damaged. There were times that they took me up on it...LOL Mostly they would settle down. I think it is important to let sibling try to resolve it so they have the skills to do so with their peers eventually. We can't be everywhere with them and it is a powerful tool they need to know...Hope this helps some BUT if all else fails I'll meet you at Starbucks!!!
Before I read anyone else's comments, I was going to be obnoxious and unhelpful once again! I was going to say to turn on the sound machine and draw a bubble bath while you turn on some Lite 102.
This happens quite often at my house. I don't run to the situation, but I usually find that it's a really unnecessary shrill because someone did something that the other really didn't like and no one is really hurt. But, I let them know that they need to let me know what's going on and how I can help. If they are both being honest and let me know that one did in fact do something that they shouldn't have and that definitely warrants discipline, I do that right then and there. I explain to them that God blessed each of them with this sibling that they have and that they are precious gifts to eachother and how would God like to see us treating our precious gifts like a brother or sister? I even sometimes shed a tear over it all (dramatic) and it seems to go well :-)
Ahhh--stick my fingers in my ears and loudly go "la la la la la!"
:-P
I'm still in the one kid phase so I'm just here to glean.
I sense I'll be quick to get involved--Pete the one to say, "let them figure it out!" I imagine you need to do a little of both.
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